my religious beliefs

Dear Bobby and Lizzy,
Once again, I share these with you in case you're curious---not because I want or expect you to have the same beliefs. In fact, I am especially proud of you for your independence of mind.
First, I cannot help but believe that there is a benevolent God. Although I would probably call myself an agnostic, because I don't think that any of us can know for sure about such things, it is easier for me to believe in a divine Creator than in the random creation of the universe, including our planet's incredible beauty and the complexity of the human spirit. Additionally, I find some resonance with Christianity. When I pray, I often address my prayer to Jesus, whose story compels me. But I would not call myself a Christian, at least not in any orthodox sense of the word. I do not believe in the infallibility of the bible. I do not believe in the literal truth of many of its stories. I do not, for instance, believe in the story of Noah's Ark, or Adam and Eve. I do not believe that there is a literal hell, nor do I believe that there is only one pathway to God. I dislike many of the people who call themselves Christians but have hatred for illegal immigrants, gays, and anyone who disagrees with them.
Every morning, when I walk the dogs, I stop on a hill from which I can see our home, and I give thanks to God for the rich way he has blessed me, and for protecting my family. I feel extremely grateful for the life I have been given and for the success my kids are experiencing.
I am inclined to believe that the human spirit is not confined to skin and bones---that it survives our corporeal death, though perhaps it simply becomes a part of the cosmos at that time. If there is such a thing as heaven, it would consist, for me, of a reunion with my family and close friends. It would feel like a university, with unlimited opportunity to learn from scholars. There would be no more rancor, worry, or suffering. There would be only joy. And if there is no literal heaven, and our spirits are simply diffused into the cosmos, there is still an end to our rancor, worry, and suffering. There would be only peace. I am unafraid of death. I have lived a great life, and been blessed richly. I hope to live another twenty-five years, lead a college, pamper grandkids, teach, write, read, and travel---but even if I were to die this evening, I would consider myself a very fortunate man.
Love,
Dad

my political beliefs

Dear Bobby and Lizzy,
I share my political beliefs with you NOT because I want you or expect you to agree with them, but just in case you ever wonder where I stand. First, I have been a registered independent (decline to state) since I first registered to vote when I was 18. I am not a Democrat, because I believe in low taxes, small government, free enterprise, and individual responsibility. I am not a Republican, because I believe in environmental protection, compassion for immigrants, and equal rights for gays. And despite my generally conservative, free-market views on economic policy, I support the President's health care reforms because it is outrageously indecent for a nation as wealthy as ours to deny medical care to the poor---especially to kids.
I used to say that I am an economic conservative and a social liberal, but that is not entirely true. Though I lean conservative on economics, my views on health care for all Americans are an exception to my libertarian leanings. Though I lean liberal on social issues, I am rather conservative on criminal justice issues(I do not oppose the death penalty, and I would abolish the exclusionary rule). And though I lean pro-choice on the issue of abortion, I do not believe that a woman's right to abort should be unlimited---the interests of the father and the fetus matter also.

Love,
Dad

just in case

Dear Bobby and Lizzy,
This post will be a little morbid, because it addresses my final wishes. As I expressed in my first post, I hope to live a long time still, but just in case fate has other plans for me, these are my final wishes:
1. I do NOT want to be preserved on life support systems once it is clear that I have suffered irreversible damage that will prevent me from leading a normal and independent life. As a matter of fact, I do not want to be in any dependent state of existence---when I am no longer able to care for myself, my strong desire is to find a dignified and expedient way to die;
2. Upon my death, I want to be cremated(after any parts of my body have been harvested for organ donor or related medical purposes), and my ashes disposed of in any way you and Nancy wish. Please find the least expensive arrangement available---the LAST thing I want is to waste valuable resources on a funeral director's sales pitch;
3. At the moment, I have one major financial goal, and that is to help Lizzy complete her baccalaureate education, as we have done now for Christopher, Bobby, and Emma. Once this goal has been met, whatever modest estate is left, my wish is that it be used to help Nancy live comfortably, and any balance to be shared equally among our four children. Although I hope to help all of our kids a little with the cost of graduate school, I trust that you will be able to pay most of those expenses through your own resourcefulness.
These wishes have no legal effect. Nancy and I have a Trust which generally spells these out in legal form, but I want you to know of my wishes to guide you if necessary.
Love,
Dad

everybody's heart gets broken

Hi Bobby and Lizzy,
I am very happy that you both have a companion. My deepest wish for both of you is that you have long and happy lives with someone who will love you for who you are. I would do anything to spare you heartache, but I also know that just about everyone gets their heart broken at some point. It feels like the end of the world at the time, and you think the person who broke your heart is the only one for you. Rest assured, though, that time will heal this wound. It may take months or even a couple of years for the pain to subside entirely, but it will definitely diminish over time, until it is nothing more than a distant wistful feeling. And there is this consolation: every time our heart gets broken, the pain and recovery makes us stronger, wiser, and more authentic. The only kids' book I love is the Velveteen Rabbit, for it stands for exactly that proposition: it is not until we get a little beaten up by life that we become our most authentic selves. And this experience will prepare us for a greater relationship, and will help us better discern who we choose to fall in love with the next time. But we must overcome the fear of being hurt again that makes some people unable to recover from their wounds. We must take another chance, knowing that even if this relationship also fails, it will not be the end of the world. And while we are in pain, we should be kind to ourselves, seek the company of our friends and family, and find peace within as best we can until the natural buoyancy of our spirit reemerges. I promise that it will.
Love,
Dad

my best advice

Dear Bobby and Lizzy,
My two best word of advice are:
1. find something you love to do as your career. Many Americans dread Monday morning. You will spend a vast portion of your life at work, so choose a career which you will enjoy, even if it pays less than other fields. I used to tell my students to "follow their dreams", but that is probably not sound advice if your dreams are to play professional sports, or to become a professional musician, because the odds of achieving your dreams are very low. After all, you need not forego your dreams by having a good back-up plan;
2. when it is time to choose a life partner, choose someone who is fundamentally kind. The way to tell about their kindness is to go to a restaurant with them and watch how they treat the busboy---do they acknowledge and thank him, or do they ignore him and only acknowledge the waiter?
If you only remember two things I told you, make it those two and your life will be much happier. Of less importance, but still worth remembering:
3. surround yourself only with friends who genuinely respect and support you. There are many insecure people who will seek your company and purport to be your friends, but instead of bolstering you, they bring you down. You can pity them and help them if you like, but limit your time with them and recognize that they are not trustworthy;
4. give more than you take, and your value to this world has been established. Help those in need, find opportunities to perform acts of kindness, bring positive energy to every meeting you attend, treat the environment with respect---these are such simple and self-evident values, but it is easy to lose sight of their importance. In the long run, these will form and inform your legacy.
Love,
Dad

For Bobby and Lizzy

I begin this blog for my children, Bobby and Lizzy. While I hope to live a long time, I was reminded of my mortality recently, and I want to leave this journal behind, to remind you both of how much I love you, and how proud I am of you. I also hope that my words can provide comfort and guidance when I am no longer here.
The title I chose, "vista alta", is intended to convey the idea that life is best understood from a high view, and not from the challenges and setbacks which we all must periodically face. At the moment, my distant vision is blurry, a troubling byproduct of my diabetes. But even if my vision deteriorates, and even if my life is shortened by this insidious illness, I have had an exceptionally rich life, and am grateful beyond description. I cannot convey how proud I am of Bobby, who graduates UCLA in June with an outstanding academic record and a good shot at Yale Law School, and of Lizzy, who transfers to UCSD this Fall, to begin the next phase of her own academic journey.
Perhaps I should begin by telling you a little about your old man, though I doubt that any of this will be new to you. I am the proud son of two great parents(grandpa Amador and grandma Josie) who came to the US from Mexico with an 8th grade education, and a determination to provide their kids with a good education. My sister, your aunt Hilda, owns and runs a Minuteman Press in Long Beach. My brother, your uncle Amador, owns a shipping container business also based in Long Beach. I am very proud of both of my siblings.
I am also proud of my own accomplishments. After earning my Bachelor's degree, I worked my way through law school, receiving my Juris Doctorate, followed by a Master's in Business and Tax Laws. I have now practiced law for over twenty-six years. In the early years, I practiced law full-time and taught law part-time(at CSUS and the University of Northern California School of Law). In 1991(the year Lizzy was born!), I accepted a full-time teaching position at Sierra College, and I scaled back my law practice to part-time. I taught and practiced law at Sierra for fifteen years, until accepting an appointment as Associate Dean of Business and Technology. I am currently the Dean of that division, and my goal is to become a college president by the time I reach the age of sixty. For that reason, I will begin studies at UC Davis toward a doctorate in educational leadership.
I wish that I knew more about our family history to share with you. Grandpa Amador used to say that we are descendants of the Aztec indians, but I would love to conduct a genealogical study to learn the specifics of our predecessors.
I'm going to keep this first post---and perhaps every post--- short, so that it does not tax your interest or my attention span.
Love,
Dad